Welcome to Following the Whispers blog
Thank you so much for taking the time to visit. Hope you enjoy your stay. I blog here whenever I feel the need. This blog was created at the time my memoir came out, in February, 2009. Its motto was: creating a life of inner peace and self-acceptance from the depths of despair. Now, my focus is sharing this journey we call life.
“Only one thing is more frightening than speaking your truth, and that is not speaking it.” Naomi Wolf
“We are called human beings, not human doings.” Wes Nisker, Buddhist teacher
“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs…(And) if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly.” Theodore Roosevelt
Tuesday, June 2, 2009
Standing Up For Yourself
* We guess at what normal is
* We get guilt feelings when we stand up for ourselves
I don't have too much trouble with the first one, since it no longer matters to me what someone else's definition of normal is. I just need to make wise decisions for myself that meet my own code of ethics and fit my values.
The second one, however, still plagues me. I am so afraid of hurting or angering someone else, I tolerate inappropriate behavior for way too long. Then when I finally realize I need to do something about it, I feel guilty because I might upset someone else. Recognizing that this is an old, automatic response, I came up with this: It is not my intention to hurt you. It is my intention to take care of myself.
How do you handle standing up for yourself in situations where someone gets angry or defensive?