Welcome to Following the Whispers blog
Thank you so much for taking the time to visit. Hope you enjoy your stay. I blog here whenever I feel the need. This blog was created at the time my memoir came out, in February, 2009. Its motto was: creating a life of inner peace and self-acceptance from the depths of despair. Now, my focus is sharing this journey we call life.
“Only one thing is more frightening than speaking your truth, and that is not speaking it.” Naomi Wolf
“We are called human beings, not human doings.” Wes Nisker, Buddhist teacher
“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs…(And) if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly.” Theodore Roosevelt
Thursday, September 17, 2009
Obligation, Burden, or Joy
Two of us want to do more than one gig per month. This presented a dilemma.
First, we needed to ascertain whether the one who is over-committed elsewhere was still committed to our group. She is. Check. Then we needed to solve the problem of doing more gigs when only two of us could do them. We found a singer who is willing to substitute when necessary. Check. Third, we need to get said substitute singer up to speed by scheduling time for her to learn the material. Check. Lastly, we needed to make sure everyone was okay with this solution. Check.
What I ended up saying to my over-committed partner is, "The whole reason we began this project is because we love to sing and we love bringing our joy to our elders. If it feels like a burden or an obligation, that doesn't really work."
Writing was beginning to feel like an obligation, rather than fill me with joy as it always has. If it doesn't flow out of me, if I'm having to struggle to get words down on paper, if I'm dreading the time in front of the blank page, that doesn't work for me. Just as it didn't work for my over-committed partner. We found a way for her to continue singing without feeling burdened or feeling like she was stifling our needs. I'm working on figuring out my solution to writing without feeling burdened by it. I'll keep you posted.
How much of your life is filled with obligation, responsibility and things that feel burdensome, rather than those things that give you joy?