Welcome to Following the Whispers blog
Thank you so much for taking the time to visit. Hope you enjoy your stay. I blog here whenever I feel the need. This blog was created at the time my memoir came out, in February, 2009. Its motto was: creating a life of inner peace and self-acceptance from the depths of despair. Now, my focus is sharing this journey we call life.
“Only one thing is more frightening than speaking your truth, and that is not speaking it.” Naomi Wolf
“We are called human beings, not human doings.” Wes Nisker, Buddhist teacher
“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs…(And) if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly.” Theodore Roosevelt
Tuesday, December 22, 2009
Telling the Truth Tuesday - Assumptions
My feelings were hurt. Then I caught myself in an old pattern--feeling left out and ignored. It lasted about 10 seconds, one for the record books, let me tell you. Immediately, I realized I'd assumed B wasn't going to the movies because she hadn't called like she said she would. Assumed is the key word here, folks.
Sunday morning, B called. "Where were you?" Hmmm. She'd assumed we were meeting at the theater. When I wasn't there, she'd assumed I was too tired to come.
In the scheme of things, this one is no big deal. I missed going to a movie with friends and had a boring Saturday night at home by myself. Blah. Blah. Blah.
But making assumptions is a big deal. I guess if there is chronic behavior, say someone always stops for a drink on their way home from work, it's safe to assume that's why they are late every night. Maybe.
Asking questions was always difficult for me. I don't like asking them and I don't like being asked questions. But I've learned how important it is to clarify things. If someone I love seems distant and uncommunicative, I used to assume I'd done something to cause it. If my parents were fighting, I used to assume it was my fault. If I ate right and exercised and still didn't lose a pound or so over a few week period, I'd assume I was doing something wrong.
But I'm going to make a big ole assumption here today. I bet I'm not the only one out here who gets in trouble because of her assumptions? Well, hmmm, how about it? Fess up. It's telling the truth Tuesday after all.
Many blessings to you and your families for a happy and healthy holiday season.