Welcome to Following the Whispers blog

Thank you so much for taking the time to visit. Hope you enjoy your stay. I blog here whenever I feel the need. This blog was created at the time my memoir came out, in February, 2009. Its motto was: creating a life of inner peace and self-acceptance from the depths of despair. Now, my focus is sharing this journey we call life.

“Only one thing is more frightening than speaking your truth, and that is not speaking it.” Naomi Wolf

“We are called human beings, not human doings.” Wes Nisker, Buddhist teacher

“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs…(And) if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly.” Theodore Roosevelt

Monday, March 22, 2010

Weekend update

Thanks, everyone, for your wonderful comments on impatience. The car still hasn't arrived. It was a surprise  to hear that many of you thought I wasn't out of line for being impatient. So I heeded your advice and began calling every day. On Friday, I got someone on the phone and told them if I'd told my clients the kinds of things I was being told, I would have been out of business so darn fast. In this day and age, with the technology that is available, it is inconceivable that you cannot find out where this car is and why it hasn't been put on a rail car to Albuquerque. On Saturday, I received a phone call that a tracer had been placed with Burlington on the car. At least I know they're doing something to try to help.

Thank goodness for singing. Had a gig Saturday afternoon. Big lesson learned there as well. Each of the singers felt as if we hadn't done very well after the concert was over. We were disappointed in our individual songs, the group songs lacked energy, blah blah blah. Thankfully, I'd asked my hubby to videotape the concert and three of us went back to our house to watch it. Yes, there were glitches and slip-ups, but they DID NOT MATTER. Perhaps it wasn't our best performance of a particular song, but the vocals were just fine and the songs went over well. Because we sang from our hearts. We connected with the audience. For those of you who watch American Idol, it's what the judges say over and over. If you are in the moment, connecting with the song, the pitch issues don't matter so much. It's also true in real life as well. If we come from our heart and connect with others, our relationships are so much richer.

We are all so darned hard on ourselves, it's ridiculous. And I don't just mean my singing buddies. I mean everyone I know - and that probably includes all of you reading this blog whom I've never met in person.
Making a mistake doesn't make us imperfect. Making a mistake doesn't mean the whole whatever is bad. Making a mistake IS HUMAN. It's probably what makes us most loveable. Except we hate to appear vulnerable, don't we?

How's this for growth? One of the songs I'm singing is "To Know Him is To Love Him." It has three-part harmony and I'm singing the melody. I'm a low alto. The previous song was sung by a soprano and the pitch had been raised two 1/2 steps for her. I started singing my song and realized it was way too high. I'd forgotten to lower the pitch, not just back to normal, but I sing it two 1/2 steps lower than normal. So it was 4 steps off. As soon as I realized it, I said, "Excuse me, I'm very sorry, but I forgot to lower the song and I can't sing it this way. Is it okay if we start it over?" And I went and switched the pitch and began again.

If only we could know, in each and every moment, that we are okay. That as long as we are doing our best, we are okay. I remember in the 1970's, there was a book called "I'm okay, you're okay." I'm going to adopt that saying for now to remind myself that we're all okay.



L. Diane Wolfe said...

Mistakes are how we learn, but we do wish they'd happen to someone else instad!

And Burlington, NC? Sorry my state is holding your car hostage, Karen!

Elizabeth Spann Craig/Riley Adams said...

Hope you get your car soon, Karen! How completely frustrating!

I like your saying. :) I'll have to remember that today as I make my mistakes and try to move on...

Mystery Writing is Murder

Mason Canyon said...

We do all make mistakes. There are just days I think I make my and everyone else's in a 20-mile radius. Hope your car arrives today.

Joanne said...

I remember that book, it was very popular! You're so right, it's not always the technicalities of what we do that shine, or are remembered. It's the heart we put into things. A good thought to remember.

Cyndi said...

That is an excellent book! Clearly I need to re-read it as I've been doing the same, beating myself up a lot lately.

I love Idol and was thinking of just that as I read that your husband recorded your performance! Thank goodness you stopped to lower the key rather than try to sing the soprano melody. I'm an alto too and I know how I would sound if I tried to hit those high notes (yikes!).

Jane Kennedy Sutton said...

Excellent point. I haven't thought about that book in years, but I think I'm going to adopt the "I'm okay, you're okay," philosophy too.

Elspeth Antonelli said...

Congratulations on another performance. I admire your fortitude in starting the song over. That took courage.

Helen Ginger said...

I love coming here and reading your posts. They're so positive and uplifting. As I read, I thought of a friend of mine who is just starting her blog. Y'all really are different, but her last two posts have been about her retreat she's taking on her own (sans husband). I have no idea why, but it made me think of you. Perhaps because I think both of you are brave and wonderful to share with others.

Straight From Hel

I'm OK Marv said...

I loved that book when it came out, and it definitely helped me mature and accept myself. I was so pleasantly surprised when, back when I was oh, maybe 30 or so, I went home to visit my parents and they were reading it, too! We had a great conversation about our relationship to each other. Really helped.

Nice wrap-up post, Karen.

The Old Silly

Ann said...

I wish I could say, I was OK with my mistakes. I do have a tendency to brow beat myself. I will have to look out for that book. Have a wonderful afternoon.