Welcome to Following the Whispers blog
Thank you so much for taking the time to visit. Hope you enjoy your stay. I blog here whenever I feel the need. This blog was created at the time my memoir came out, in February, 2009. Its motto was: creating a life of inner peace and self-acceptance from the depths of despair. Now, my focus is sharing this journey we call life.
“Only one thing is more frightening than speaking your truth, and that is not speaking it.” Naomi Wolf
“We are called human beings, not human doings.” Wes Nisker, Buddhist teacher
“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs…(And) if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly.” Theodore Roosevelt
Tuesday, May 4, 2010
Telling the Truth Tuesday - mom
Last week I had a setback after our birthday concert at my home. All these negative voices kept shouting in my ear. Here's the wisdom that came through as I looked at those voices:
There are pieces you are still missing from your childhood. Your mother said and did things that your former singing teacher embodied for you and gave voice to. Things like, "You don't belong, you never belonged, you can't do harmony. You have pitch problems. You're flat. Your own mother lied to you about you, about who you are, what you could do or not do, what life is about. She didn't know any better. She did what was done to her. And a teacher who says such damaging things to a student should be stopped.
You have to sort out the truth of the issue for yourself. Stop saying you don't have a good voice. That's not the issue. Figure out the real reason you are so compelled to sing in public and work from that. It's not about your voice and how good it is.
Why do you want to perform? As a child, you gloried in being the center of attention - until the Painter molested you when you were just 7 years old. That attention brought you trouble. Now the attention brings joy to elders. it can no longer bring you harm. Your mother is no longer alive to judge you and freeze you out. Your former singing teacher is no longer in the picture. The other Sugartimes adore you. So do your friends.
Singing is shouting to the world: I am here. Look at me. Listen to me. Pay attention. I have something to say. Something to give to you. A little piece of me. It's the same with writing. It's spiritual for you, Karen. It's not about performing. This is your ministry. The writing and Sugartime. You need to fully embrace who you really are.
I was silenced as a child. This is my time. These are my words.
What are yours?