Welcome to Following the Whispers blog

Thank you so much for taking the time to visit. Hope you enjoy your stay. I blog here whenever I feel the need. This blog was created at the time my memoir came out, in February, 2009. Its motto was: creating a life of inner peace and self-acceptance from the depths of despair. Now, my focus is sharing this journey we call life.

“Only one thing is more frightening than speaking your truth, and that is not speaking it.” Naomi Wolf

“We are called human beings, not human doings.” Wes Nisker, Buddhist teacher

“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs…(And) if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly.” Theodore Roosevelt

Monday, June 21, 2010

Monday Musings

Buddy update:
We have good news! Our doggy, Buddy, is doing much better. His blood sugar levels have come way down, which means he is no longer insulin resistant. So, he has diabetes, a thyroid condition, and arthritis, but he's back to being his sweet, loving, somewhat peppy self. Yippee!! Thanks for all your kind thoughts and well wishes.

I am in a major transformational period in my life and it feels as if I am walking on sand. The foundation underneath me is uneven, soft in places, hard in others. I never know from one moment to the next how I'm going to feel, think, see, or be. And neither do my friends and family. They are good changes, I think. But change is change, and everyone reacts to change differently.

A friend and I were talking the other day how, when you know people for a long time, other peoples' perceptions of you rarely shift. They don't update the files, no matter how much you change. So, because I was pretty much an emotional basketcase in 1994 when I moved to New Mexico, that is how my friends see me.

The truth is, I am an emotional person. I think feelings are important. If we ignore or deny our feelings, we end up more stressed, more irritable or angry or sad, or we get sick because we've repressed the emotions so much, our bodies have no outlet other than illness. But I am no longer a basket case. I have learned to manage my emotions.

Do you believe people have accurate perceptions of you? If not, do you try to change that?


Mary said...

I don't feel so much that I am changing but that I am growing. Some around me don't realize they are also growing that's why we remain friends. Others want to hold on to the past for whatever reason and they drift on to people in their same place. I know that I can't force them to grow and I can't stop growing.
I recognize the sand you're in. It's that last step before you let go and embrace something new about you.
Go girl! (As the kids used to say. l0l)

Giggles and Guns

L. Diane Wolfe said...

Great news about Buddy!!!

First impressions are the most difficult to change. And you're right - when you see someone all the time, changes aren't noticable.

Cyndi said...

Good to hear about Buddy!

No, I don't try to change anyone's perception of me. I used to pretty much devote all of my energy to controlling everyone's perception of me. It wore me out.

I am who I am at any given moment. My true friends love me as much when I'm in a happy mood as when I'm a basket case. My thought is that anyone who can't accept me, warts and all, is not a good friend and therefore, not worthy of much (if any) of my attention.

Donna M. Kohlstrom said...

So happy to hear that Buddy is doing well!

I've stopped being what I think everyone else wants me to be and have started just being me and love me!

Mason Canyon said...

Great news about Buddy. Glad he's on a good track. I try not to judge on first impressions and hope others do the same. Could be a bad day for both the first time.

BTW, like the new look.

Thoughts in Progress

Joanne said...

Sometimes perceptions are also shaped based on the other person's feelings, insecurities, attitude. So I don't try to change perceptions of me, but just put my true self out there. Then, whatever will be, will be.

Jane Kennedy Sutton said...

I think my close friends know me quite well and we have all accepted the changes and growth that happens as we age. Other people who I don’t know as well sometimes make comments that catch me off guard. Even though they are usually positive, I’m always tempted to turn around and see who they really must be talking about because they are so not me. I don't try to change their perception; I just smile and say, "Thanks."

Ann said...

Delighted to hear Buddy is doing well. Wow! You have really spruced up your blog. Love the new look.

I am often surprised at peoples perceptions of me.

Vicki Rocho said...

Yay for Buddy!

Good question, I think for what I've shown them, people probably have a fairly reasonable perception of me. However, I'm a whole lot more than I've had the courage to let on, so there are some surprises in store for people if I ever learn to really let go!

Elizabeth Spann Craig/Riley Adams said...

I'm so glad to hear about Buddy!

I think it annoys me when I believe people have the wrong impression of me. In fact, I know it does. Especially if I think they're holding on to an impression of me on a particularly bad day! It really shouldn't matter, of course--their perception doesn't change how we really are. But it's hard.

Anonymous said...

That's a great thought-provoking last question, Karen. I think people's perceptions are up to them. Someone recently said to me: "You are one of the kindest people I know." I don't think of myself as particularly kind; it is something others think about me, but I appreciate the feedback, and I do try to act in kind ways. I'm glad to hear Buddy is back to his peppy old self. Give him a scratch just above the tail for me.

Tabitha Bird said...

Hmmm... The more I go through in life, the less I care what people think of me, right or wrong. And the less I need to go and make sure people think the right thing of me. No matter what I do there will always be people who cannot let go of the broken girl I once was. I think this says more about them then it does me. I have moved on. I know it. What they know is irrelevant. It no longer steals my joy.