Writing is freakin' hard. Damn it. Why can’t I ever choose anything easy? Trying to sing three-part harmony before I’d ever tried two part was just plain ridiculous. Writing a memoir when I’d never written anything more than an article or essay, well, let’s just say it wasn’t a piece of cake. And I had to go back to school to finally finish it. But that was part of the journey, wasn’t it? So what is this journey going to look like? I haven’t a %^&* clue. Why am I cursing? Am I angry? If so, what am I angry at? I'm angry at myself for not wanting to exercise—ever. Singing is fun. I do love it when it comes together, but I don’t love it when it isn’t working. So in order for me to love something, it has to be working right? Does that mean if a friend isn’t working right, I won’t love them? No, of course not. So I need to love my wips even if they are not coming together. Or even working on any level at this point.
Of the two pieces: a book on aging, and the novel about the wishing steps, is there one that is calling to me right now? Both seem to have equal “needing to be written” rights. The wishing steps is the one that is going to be the hardest in terms of spiritual journey into the unknown. The voice which came to me in Scotland asking me to tell its story hasn't made an appearance lately. And in order to write the aging book, I need to do interviews and research. I have no energy right now. All I seem to have energy for is walking and singing and minimal chores like shopping and cooking easy things. Since I can’t change that, how about accepting that due to all the various issues I'm dealing with right now, my own as well as others, I am exhausted, spiritually, emotionally and physically. It’s legitimate. This is where I am super hard on myself. Thinking that I shouldn’t feel what I’m feeling, especially when anyone who experiences what I do just might be tired also.
Why don’t I think about intention? I am setting intention to:
• Be good to myself on a moment to moment, daily basis
• Exercise every day, if possible
• Practice singing each day
• Write the books: 1) Intention for aging book: to offer a guide to aging boomers about aging and caring for aging parents; 2) Intention for The Wishing Steps: to follow inner guidance and let this story unfold
What might you set your intentions towards?
Insecure Writers Support Group
Welcome to Following the Whispers blog
Thank you so much for taking the time to visit. Hope you enjoy your stay. I blog here on Monday and Tuesday. This blog was created at the time my memoir came out, in February, 2009. Its motto was: creating a life of inner peace and self-acceptance from the depths of despair.
"ONLY ONE THING IS MORE FRIGHTENING THAN SPEAKING YOUR TRUTH, AND THAT IS NOT SPEAKING IT." Naomi Wolf
"We are called human beings, not human doings."
Wes Nisker, Buddhist teacher
"The way to do is to be."