Welcome to Following the Whispers blog

Thank you so much for taking the time to visit. Hope you enjoy your stay. I blog here whenever I feel the need. This blog was created at the time my memoir came out, in February, 2009. Its motto was: creating a life of inner peace and self-acceptance from the depths of despair. Now, my focus is sharing this journey we call life.

“Only one thing is more frightening than speaking your truth, and that is not speaking it.” Naomi Wolf

“We are called human beings, not human doings.” Wes Nisker, Buddhist teacher

“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs…(And) if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly.” Theodore Roosevelt

Tuesday, April 9, 2013

Telling the Truth Tuesday: self-nurturing

I had lunch last week with two dear friends who happen to be quite a bit older than me. One is in her 90s, the other in her mid-eighties. I love the wisdom I glean from listening to the two of them. I may not always agree, but I always learn something of value. This time it was about self-nurturing. And it's funny, because when one of them speaks, I jump to the conclusion that what she is saying has absolutely no relevance to the conversation, but I am almost always wrong. She just has a winding  way of getting to her point. And sometimes that roundabout has value as well. I thought I was a good listener, but I'm not. I'm an impatient listener. Must learn to slow myself down. With everything. I eat fast. I talk fast. I listen fast. Where am I rushing to?

Anyway, back to the lunch. They both shared that I am an intense person. I drive myself really hard and exhaust myself in the process. Then when I get the result I want, I've worked so hard for it, I hardly enjoy it. Hmmm. Do I really even know what it feels like to truly be relaxed. To not have my shoulders scrunched and tense. To not have my mind chattering away. To not be breathing too fast because I'm anxious. Not!

So I am learning to be more self-nurturing. I'll let you know how I do that as I figure it out.
How about you? Are you good at nurturing yourself?

Blessings,
Karen

14 comments:

YVONNE LEWIS: said...

I love to spoil myself sometimes when the going gets tough. I may buy a cd or go to the other extreme book a holiday with my brother to visit Branson MO.in November......something to look forward to should there be not so good days in the months ahead.

Yvonne.

Elizabeth Spann Craig/Riley Adams said...

I think you and I have a lot in common, Karen! No, I'm not good at nurturing myself. Will try to work on that, though.

Susan Roebuck said...

Good post, Karen - one that makes me realize I need self-nurturing in sackloads!

Karen Walker said...

Oh, Yvonne, I love how you nurture yourself
Elizabeth, let's support each other in this, okay?
Susan, I think most women do, and probably a lot of men as well
Karen

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

I bet your husband knows how to relax. I think it's a natural state for men. We know how to chill and enjoy.

Karen Walker said...

Alex, I hope it can be a learned trait

Claudia Moser said...

Hm ... We are very similar, people do tend to tell me that I do everything very fast, but I came at peace with this since this is me!

L. Diane Wolfe said...

I don't think I know how to really relax either. My husband is always telling me that I don't need to 'produce' something or be productive every hour of the day.

Margo Kelly said...

I'm hard working and driven. I have trouble relaxing. I feel like I always need to be accomplishing or doing something. :) *sigh* We should take a week at a resort spa and practice relaxing.

Deanie Humphrys-Dunne said...

It's so easy to become completely engrossed in your projects. I think many of us have that single-minded sense of purpose sometimes. When we were growing up, our parents always reminded us how important it was to finish what we started so we try to adhere to that philosophy.
But everyone needs to find ways to relax so you refresh the passion you have for your favorite projects.
I hope you'll stop by my blog to find out about my children's books:
www.dhdunne.blogspot.com.

Optimistic Existentialist said...

I have gotten better about nurturing myself over the past few years...I think it's so vital to take care of ourselves. We often neglect ourselves without even realizing it.

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Tracy Moore said...

I'm not really good at nurturing myself yet. Getting better at it, but still have work to do there too.

Tracy Jo said...

I am not good at it either but am getting better. Every since I quit my corporate job, I have tried to learn to calm down, slow down and breathe. It is hard when you are wired a certain way! Meditation really helps too...have you tried that? Have a great Sunday!