Welcome to Following the Whispers blog
Thank you so much for taking the time to visit. Hope you enjoy your stay. I blog here whenever I feel the need. This blog was created at the time my memoir came out, in February, 2009. Its motto was: creating a life of inner peace and self-acceptance from the depths of despair. Now, my focus is sharing this journey we call life.
“Only one thing is more frightening than speaking your truth, and that is not speaking it.” Naomi Wolf
“We are called human beings, not human doings.” Wes Nisker, Buddhist teacher
“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs…(And) if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly.” Theodore Roosevelt
Tuesday, July 30, 2013
I haven't been able to dance much the last few years because of my knee (very little cartilage left), but I'm going to camp this year to hang out with friends and dance a little. Our camp takes place on a university campus where we stay in the dorms and eat in the cafeteria. After taking part in workshops all day long, we dance from 8 - 11 pm, then hang out in the lounge with guitars and other instruments and sing till 1 or 2 am.
Now that we're all getting older, not sure how the hanging out part after the dance party will go, but I'll let you know.
Monday, July 29, 2013
But are there some wounds that aren't "healable?" Are there some things one must learn to live with and manage? I have a tendency to want to give up when the going gets tough. However, I also tend to work through those feelings and keep going. I've also resigned from friendships and situations and jobs that were toxic. I've also learned there are some things I just cannot fix or change and I must just accept.
Telling the difference between these three things can be very challenging.
I'm facing this challenge now with my health. In the scheme of things, it's not bad. Nothing is life threatening. However, it is impacting my quality of life somewhat. I am thinking I just need to start acting as if I'm perfectly healthy.
How about you?
Tuesday, July 23, 2013
How about you?
How's your summer so far?
Monday, July 22, 2013
Tuesday, July 16, 2013
Do you need a pause button?
Monday, July 15, 2013
I wasn't ready for this. I've been caregiver for my two parents, my mother-in-law, an elderly friend, and I've helped friends caretake their elderly parents, so I have a pretty good idea of what to expect. I just didn't expect to deal with some of these issues until I was in my 70s or 80s.
The A-fib is not life-threatening unless it begins to happen more frequently and last longer. I just have to watch for stroke symptoms. Last Thursday nite I got what was probably the worst heartburn I've ever experienced. It felt like a giant metal claw had clamped onto my heart and was squeezing it tight. The pain was down my arm and I wondered if I might be having a heart attack and not just indigestion and heart burn. I toyed with the idea of calling 911 (hubby was asleep and didn't want to disturb him) but just decided to wait it out. Eventually, after two antacids, the pain subsided.
I have a choice. I can live my life in fear that my heart will go wonky or that I will have a massive stroke and either be a vegetable or die. Or I can live my life not identifying myself as someone with heart disease, but taking as good a care of myself as I can, and actually living my life. As fully and as deeply as I possibly can.
I'm working on wrapping my mind around the idea that I have heart disease. Once I accept that, my choice is clear. To wear myself out living my passions and not allow the fear to paralyze me. I've spent way too many years paralyzed by emotional and psychological issues to let this stop me now.
How about you? Does fear keep you from living your life the way you would like?
Tuesday, July 9, 2013
The more awareness I have about this, the more I can stop and let go. And the more I do that, the better things work. I've taken to asking myself: Is this mine? my feeling? my responsibility? my issue? It helps a lot, rather than just take on everything occurring around me. It's a huge relief to know I am only responsible for my own behavior. I can't fix or change anyone else. Whew!
How about you? Are you controlling or are you able to let go?
Monday, July 8, 2013
Now I think I know what I need to do for my next draft. Thank you, Suze and Tracy.
How about you? Do you live your life using all of your senses?
Friday, July 5, 2013
So today I thank each and every one of you for the support and encouragement I always feel when one of you stops by and leaves a few words. I probably should have done a giveaway, but sigh, I didn't think of it in time. So, if I ever get to 1000, watch out!
Wednesday, July 3, 2013
It's time for the IWSG again, the brainchild of Alex J. Cavanaugh
Alex has provided a way for writers who blog to share their thoughts and feelings about where they are in their process and receive support in return. It's a real blessing. Here are my thoughts for this month.
I never intended to write fiction. I love reading it. Have since I was a child. But writing it? A whole other ball of wax, ballgame, can of worms, see what I mean, cliche after cliche. I am not a fiction writer. But somehow, I have been called upon to write the story the voice whispered to me in the Scottish Highlands and then again in Ireland, "Tell my story, tell my story."
Oy vay! My first draft is done. The bare bones of the story are down on paper. But it is flat. It lacks all the things that make a novel rich and engage the reader - lush descriptions, significant details, the infamous showing versus telling. I am busy reading writing books about all of these issues and honestly, folks, I get it. But getting it and writing that way are two very different things. It feels like I'd rather yank a tooth out of my head than try to come up with better ways to say what I'm saying.
In the past, my writing has flowed naturally out of me. With this, I have to stop and think about how to say what I'm trying to say. One of the craft books says to ask, "What's the evidence?" In other words, instead of saying "She's in pain" (telling), say, "it was like a knife in her gut and she doubled over" or something like that to "show" the pain.
But frankly, I look at my sentences and my eyes glaze over. And truthfully, I don't want to work this hard. There, I've whined my truth. I want it to be easy. Just like I wanted to be able to play guitar after learning three chords. Once I accepted that it would take hard work and practice, that things don't usually come easily, at least nothing worthwhile comes easily, it got better.
So, I need to accept that this does not come easily to me, that it will take hard work and practice to make the manuscript better. The craft book I read also said that Hemingway and Fitzgerald used to practice together with one of them saying a line "telling" it and the other coming up with ways of "showing" it. If they felt they needed that kind of practice, who am I to think I should just be able to do it, just like that (snapping my fingers here).
How about you?
Tuesday, July 2, 2013
What are you grateful for today?
Monday, July 1, 2013
|This is the eternal flame at his gravesite.|
I don't think I ever fully realized the impact this event had on my life and my psyche. And I'm not sure that I ever really grieved his loss.
|This doesn't need my words|
|Do you see the pigeon? He didn't get the memo!|
|Anyone else grow up with these guys driving around the neighborhood?|
|Recognize these? They are Dorothy's ruby slippers. Cool, huh?|
|This is the box where President Lincoln was sitting in the Ford Theater when he was assassinated.|
|This tower of books is all 15,000+ books written about Lincoln - more than any other person.|
|Arlington National Cemetery|
|The gravesite of Bobby Kennedy - another assassination which occurred in the 1960's, along with Martin Luther King. Made me realize just how violent my teenage years were and what an upheaval the 1960's caused.|
|The airplane the Wright Brothers flew|
|The lunar module that landed on the moon. Talk about an event that had a major impact.|