Welcome to Following the Whispers blog

Thank you so much for taking the time to visit. Hope you enjoy your stay. I blog here whenever I feel the need. This blog was created at the time my memoir came out, in February, 2009. Its motto was: creating a life of inner peace and self-acceptance from the depths of despair. Now, my focus is sharing this journey we call life.

“Only one thing is more frightening than speaking your truth, and that is not speaking it.” Naomi Wolf

“We are called human beings, not human doings.” Wes Nisker, Buddhist teacher

“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs…(And) if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly.” Theodore Roosevelt

Monday, June 22, 2015

Letting go with the right attitude

There's a slogan in Al-Anon - Let go and Let God. I love that slogan. I have come to realize that I am a control freak. It began in early childhood because my parents fought all the time and it scared me, so I learned to try to control everything around me to feel safe. I won't go into the myriad ways I did that. But suffice it to say that doesn't work. The only things I can control are my own thoughts. I can't even control feelings, although I always try. That doesn't work either. Feelings are real and valid. It's how I express them that I can work on.

What I'm trying to say about letting go and letting God, for me, is about my attitude. Letting go of something that took so long and was so hard is not easy. Pregnancy is a nine month gestation period, than forever years to raise your child. It's not letting go. School takes years and years, but when you're done, it's over. Letting go and letting God is about setting something free without attachment. Say someone you love is very ill. You can help care for them. You can try to find a remedy or cure. But you can't fix it yourself. There's where letting go and letting God comes in.

So with my novel, The Wishing Steps, I've written the book. It's been professionally edited. I have a great query letter and synopsis. I've researched potential publishers. And I've let it fly to reach them. Now I have to let go of any attachment to the result. Not easy after I've worked so hard on it. But if I worry and fret and agonize over it, it's not going to change the outcome one iota. So, dear friends, I am doing a lot of deep breathing and, with my newfound freedom of extra time, I am having so much fun. Movies with friends, swim parties, tap dancing class, broadway dance class, folk dancing, and my Sugartime gigs.

Let go and let God. Such freedom....



Bish Denham said...

You definitely have the right attitude! It was only when I let go of fear of being alone, let go of the longing/desire for a relationship, that I met the man I've been married to for almost 30 years. But that process of letting was a long hard road.

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

All you can control is your attitude, so just let all else go. God can handle it.

Chrys Fey said...

That is a great slogan. Only when we let go can we truly live our lives and the the things God wants us to.

L. Diane Wolfe said...

Let go and let God is a wonderful attitude.

Karen Walker said...

Bish, that was true for me, too. I'd let go of needing to be in relationship.
Alex, so true.
Chrys, yes, I love the slogan as a reminder.
Diane, thanks

Jemi Fraser said...

Sounds like you're in a wonderful place, Karen. Best of luck!

Karen Jones Gowen said...

You've also got a great title for your book, Karen. Very catchy and intriguing. When it comes to certain things, all we can do is our best. We can't control the outcome.

Karen Walker said...

Jemi, I hope I can keep myself here.
Karen, thanks about the title - that makes me feel good

Cherie Reich said...

We can only do the best we can. Good luck with The Wishing Steps!

Caitlin Lane said...

A beautiful attitude to have, although there is often so much hard work and even sadness that must come first. Best of luck with the querying process.

Caitlin Lane said...

A beautiful attitude to have, although there is often so much hard work and even sadness that must come first. Best of luck with the querying process.

Sharon Lippincott said...

Great and timely reminder for me as well. Thank you!

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Arlee Bird said...

You've been doing your part, but there's only so much we can do. Don't give up, but don't fret yourself to bad health or anything like that either. Let God is a good plan.

Wrote By Rote

Robin said...

Oh Karen, I feel you on this. So much of migraine problems comes from an inability to let go. I just hold on to every darn thing. If the thing is good, great! But, it's the holding on to the bad that's literally killing me. Or it feels that anyway.

Let go. Let God.