Welcome to Following the Whispers blog

Thank you so much for taking the time to visit. Hope you enjoy your stay. I blog here whenever I feel the need. This blog was created at the time my memoir came out, in February, 2009. Its motto was: creating a life of inner peace and self-acceptance from the depths of despair. Now, my focus is sharing this journey we call life.

“Only one thing is more frightening than speaking your truth, and that is not speaking it.” Naomi Wolf

“We are called human beings, not human doings.” Wes Nisker, Buddhist teacher

“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs…(And) if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly.” Theodore Roosevelt

Monday, April 7, 2014

Monday Musings: being understood

There is nothing in the world like feeling some emotion that maybe you're struggling to figure out yourself and you begin to talk to a dear dear friend about it and through the course of the discussion, you understand what it is you are feeling and trying to say and lo and behold the dear dear friend you are talking to understands as well.  That is a feeling that is worth a million dollars.



Vicki Rocho said...

That is a powerful experience!

Optimistic Existentialist said...

It makes you feel incredible bonded with the person doesn't it?

Hilary Melton-Butcher said...

Hi Karen - that's great to read .. I do hope they're local and you can tap into their help quite often ..

Wonderful .. and now work through it .. all the very best - Hilary

Robin said...

Men call this "talking a subject to death." And maybe some women do, too. But I think of it as talking it out until it makes sense. Most men simply don't do this so they don't understand it. I think they are content living a fairly unexamined life... hahahaha. But, that feeling of discovering the core of what is bothering you, with the help of a friend, and then understanding that you are not alone in feeling that way... Priceless.

Elizabeth Spann Craig/Riley Adams said...

Isn't that wonderful? It's just like something clicks within you when you're putting the emotions into words...and then to find that someone else shared the experience/feeling, too? Really nice.

L.G. Smith said...

Yeah, that doesn't happen very often in my experience.

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

Sometimes it takes putting it into words before we understand.

Karen Walker said...

Vicki, yes, very powerful, indeed
Yes, Keith, it does foster deep intimacy
Hilary, this particular time it was a friend visiting from Oregon, but even when she's back home, we do the same thing on the phone.
Robin, I know a lot of people, not just men, who live "unexamined lives." I have male friends I can have this experience with as well, altho there are probably more women than men.
Elizabeth, yes, it is very similar to grappling with how to communicate something in writing and finding just the right words.
L.G. I have only found this kind of experience in the last decade of my life.
Alex, for me, that is very true. It is why I have kept a personal journal for so many years - to help me figure out what it is I'm feeling.

Tonja said...

My husband is my best friend. He is in denial about his hearing damage. It's hard to be understood when he thought I said something I didn't, usually the exact opposite.

Suze said...


L. Diane Wolfe said...

So happy it clicked for both of you. Talking is how women process ideas. (Men do it internally.)

Karen Walker said...

Tonja, that would be hard and so sad for both of you
Diane, yup - huge difference between the genders

BECKY said...

I loved that rambling sentence because it made me smile and I could just "hear" the excitement in your voice! So happy for you!